Choose Your Hard

VICTORIA BROWN | MAY 2023

Leadership Growth isn't easy. Choose to be an effective, inspiring leader.

I saw a tiktok (one of my favourite starts to a sentence these days lol) - focused on Choose Your Hard. It was able to articulate in such simple terms a concept that I'd been thinking about for the last few weeks. It encourages us to recognise that everything in life comes with it's own set of challenges.

Everything has a hard way, and an easy way (which is usually another hard way in disguise). 

The reason I was thinking about it was in the context of our growth as leaders, and how hard it is to consistently dedicate energy, time and money to ourselves and our growth. Whether you've been leading for years, or you're an aspiring leader, there are always areas where you can improve and refine your skills. It can be daunting to set aside the time for self-reflection, learning, and practice, especially when faced with the daily demands of your job. [See "How Leaders Actually Learn".]

Like how often do you set these SUPER inspiring intentions at the start of the year or month or week (or even DAY tbh) about when you'll spend some time on yourself - and then you get stuck in the quicksand of the day-to-day doing and your "me time" deadlines drift by.

Developing new skills and competencies is a challenge that we must face. We need to be learning new management techniques, mastering new technologies, or gaining expertise in a different industry. Continually pushing ourselves as leaders to grow and adapt is essential for long-term success. It's crucial for us as leaders to embrace the inherent difficulties in our personal and professional growth journeys. This is the thing right?  We KNOW it's important, we KNOW we need to grow and that to grow we have to put in effort, yet it still somehow drops out of the list of priorities. We think "oh it's too hard for me to find the time right now" and then in the end, we make it harder for ourselves because we lack the skills we need to be more efficient, effective, resilient, confident etc etc etccccc

Examples of the Hard Way vs the Easy Hard Way

HARD: waking up early and working out vs. EASY (HARD): sleeping in. 
Sure, sleeping in is easier in the moment - but you're impacting your mobility, physical and mental health so in the long run, it's the harder way.

HARD: working on your emotional intelligence skills vs. EASY (HARD): using your natural emotional reactions.
It's easier to just go about life reacting and thinking in your natural style that you were conditioned into by your experiences. It's harder to invest time and effort into changing inherent behaviours and reactions and triggers. Developing a high EQ can lead to better decision-making, improved team dynamics, and increased resilience in the face of challenges. On the other hand, leaders with low emotional intelligence will struggle to manage conflicts, understand their team's needs, and maintain a positive work environment. Boo.

HARD: working on your communication skills vs. EASY (HARD): using your current communication skills.
It's easier to do nothing, and go about your role communicating like you do now. Growing our communication skills takes SO much effort - it requires active listening, empathy, and a willingness to adapt your communication style to different situations and audiences. It's worth it thought because you can build stronger relationships with team members, convey your ideas more clearly, and foster a more collaborative environment. Conversely, the difficulties of leading with poor communication can result in misunderstandings, decreased morale, and reduced productivity. 

HARD: asking for and receiving feedback vs. EASY (HARD): continuing on behaving the way you are right now.
It's tough to hear feedback about ourselves, it's hard to listen to things we could have done differently and better, and to be vulnerable and sit in the discomfort of our growth areas with others. It's much harder to continue to make the same mistakes over and over, and damage relationships and kill opportunities because we aren't aware of where we need to improve.

HARD: creating discipline and setting aside time for your growth vs. EASY (HARD): stepping into the day and letting it dictate how you spend your time.
When we don't invest time in our development, we don't develop - simple. When we're ineffective as leaders we can impact the team's morale, productivity and overall success - but we also damage our credibility and lose respect from others because we're not leading by example. As leaders it's our role to help others grow, but if we're not growing, and rolemodeling the tough work you have to do to improve, why would anyone listen to us. When we don't grow, we stagnate.

Growth is not linear, and setbacks are inevitable BUT by consistently choosing your hard and facing challenges head-on, you will become a more resilient, adaptable, and effective leader.

I want you to reflect now on the challenges you're currently facing in your leadership role. Consider which aspects of your development you may have been avoiding, and commit to embracing those challenges as opportunities for growth.

Let's reflect 🪞 

• Think of a decision you're currently facing right now, what option so you perceive as the easy way vs. the hard way? If you step each option 5 steps down the road, which one has the better impact in the future?
• In what areas of your leadership have you been avoiding challenges or growth opportunities? How can you begin to embrace these challenges and choose your hard in these areas?
•  Reflect on a time when you chose the hard path in your leadership journey and experienced growth as a result. What obstacles did you face, and how did you overcome them? How has this experience impacted your leadership style and effectiveness?
• How do you currently prioritize self-reflection, learning, and self-improvement in your leadership role? In what ways can you dedicate more time and effort to these aspects of your growth?
• Consider the consequences of not growing as a leader. Have you experienced any of these consequences in your own leadership journey? How can you take action to prevent or mitigate these.

Choose the hard path of growth and reap the rewards.

VB

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